Acceptance in the Changing Commercial Real Estate Industry
By Roger Porter and Olga Brandeis
“What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly,” explains spiritual teacher and author Eckhart Tolle in his book The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment. The task of the caterpillar is to accept their current circumstance and push through to the other side. The light whispers at the end of the tunnel, coming closer and closer, until… rebirth. Before long, the bright butterfly’s wings sail on the edge of the wind.
My industry, commercial real estate finance, is grappling with 21-year high rates, rising costs and lending restrictions. How do we face these challenges in the midst of our new reality? Perhaps the key here, like the caterpillar, is acceptance. How often do we ignore and deny, obfuscate and distract from what is right in front of us? The solution all along is to accept and push forward, strengthen business relationships and collaborate on new deals.
Despite the tough realities mentioned above, I firmly believe in acceptance to move us forward. Because deals are still being made, loans continue to close and new business ventures will unfold. “There is only one world, the world pressing against you at this minute,” explains Tara Brach, a renowned writer, therapist and Buddhist meditation teacher, in her book Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life With the Heart of a Buddha. “There is only one minute in which you are alive, this minute here and now. The only way to live is by accepting each minute as an unrepeatable miracle.” Throughout my career, I’ve discovered a few key insights that help me embrace acceptance, create new opportunities, collaborate with my network and guide clients toward successful deals.
The first step during challenging times to reach acceptance is awareness.
Awareness asks us to be present in the moment, a mindfulness tactic that grounds us in reality. Eckhart Tolle, who I quoted in the opening, understands the true advantage of awareness: “When you act out the present-moment awareness, whatever you do becomes imbued with a sense of quality, care, and love - even the most simple action.” Even when my industry is experiencing tightening lending requirements and uncertainty in the markets, this awareness practice helps me to keep a positive outlook.
But awareness doesn’t stop with the individual. Awareness calls for collaboration, a firmly rooted presence in awareness of others and the ways in which we belong to a larger community. “Training ourselves to be present with each other is a way to integrate mindfulness and loving kindness into our daily life,” writes Tara Brach.
“In the moments when we communicate with honesty and kindness, we begin to dissolve the trance of separation. Instead of being driven by wanting or fear, we feel increasingly spontaneous and real. As much as any meditation, these practices allow us to discover, through relating wakefully with each other, the sweetness of our connectedness and belonging.”
Mindfulness Tip: Practice awareness in everyday business by checking the news and chatting about it with a friend, co-worker, or trusted circle– your sounding board people. This lets you share with another person in the present moment. Check out Morning Brew and the Daily Skimm for a five-minute snapshot of the news.
Rest is another essential practice on the road to acceptance.
Rest builds strength when we dwell in a place of acceptance; it is a pause for thoughtful contemplation before we make our next move. Tara Brach points out that rest is vital to achieve radical acceptance: “Through the sacred art of pausing, we develop the capacity to stop hiding, to stop running away from our experience. We begin to trust in our natural intelligence, in our naturally wise heart, in our capacity to open to whatever arises. Like awakening from a dream, in the moment of pausing our trance recedes and Radical Acceptance becomes possible.”
Not only is rest the tranquil moment before our next move, it requires us to look inside ourselves for the answer. How often do we seek outside ourselves for answers? We call friends, talk to family members, and consult professionals, which are all important to gain feedback and challenge our points of view. But as practitioners of mindfulness, turning inward and quieting our minds is equally important and allows us to listen for the softly whispering solution.
Mindfulness Tip: Take five minutes out of your day for a meditation practice. The pause will help you quiet your mind to gain clarity for everyday business decision-making. Check out Insight Timer, a free meditation app for making meditation a daily practice.
Lastly, we must take deliberate action to bring acceptance full circle.
The truth is acceptance isn’t about coming to terms with the present moment and standing idly on the sideline. Action starts with trust. With courage, we take the first step in a purposeful direction and trust that the path will unfold before us. Deliberate action is needed and time is of the essence. Action in the face of uncertainty – as with the state of the commercial real estate finance industry – is perhaps the most bold move, and the universe rewards us in ways we never imagined.
Mindfulness Tip: Breath work is a great way to calm your nervous system. Take three deep breaths (or take a look at box breathing) to help you find your focus before you take action.
If we can conjure awareness in our current situation, recharge in the dwelling place of acceptance and boldly act with trust, we find ourselves in the holy place of peace. “Our western culture [is] like a great uprooted tree with its roots in the air,” explains Tara Brach in Radical Acceptance. “We must plant ourselves again in the universe.” I see this same opportunity in the commercial real estate finance industry. Through practicing acceptance, I root in and create a brighter future for myself, my clients and my industry.
How do you practice acceptance in tough times?
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